• Amelia Hope

Do you need love or a partner?

LOVE is what we're all looking for. BUT the mistake most of us do is that we often mistaken the 'need for love' with the 'need for a partner' and as a result, we continuously put ourselves in a vicious spiral.

A spiral of:

1) Unhappiness: because while you're constantly looking for something, you are missing out on everything else, hence you're not getting anything from life in the process, because you're forgetting to heal your inner core. You end up doing things that you think will fulfill your happiness but which only make you feel better for a bit and then the pain kicks back in;

2) Failed relationships: because getting in a relationship with unreasonable expectations and a measure of how much love and happiness you're supposed to receive from your other half is like diving in the ocean with four broken limbs and expecting to stay afloat. Unless you treat your limbs and allow enough time for a full recovery so that you can swim, you will keep drowning; and

3) Loneliness: because single or not, you will always feel like you're missing something fundamental if you can't love yourself enough. As a result of feeling lonely, you will look for love in everyone else and the outcome is that people will sense it and will love you less for it because there's nothing more unattractive than lack of confidence, respect and lack of love for oneself.

It's a vicious circle. You end up settling for less because you think you don't deserve any better, you let people treat you badly because you think you're not worthy of respect or worthy of finding love and end up self sabotaging yourself by hurting your partner or rejecting them because you can't accept the love they have to offer you!

So what do you do? Love yourself first and foremost. Heh, it's easier said than done yes but deep inside you know what pains you whether it's from the past or present or worries about the future, you know what you need to do to fix these pains and you know what actions you need to take for your core to really fulfill itself: perhaps it's following your dreams like I did when I moved to London to pursue my career, perhaps it's quitting your bad vices, the ones fulfilling you temporarily and leaving you the same or worse after, maybe it's talking to a professional to get rid of painful emotions of the past, burdens and negative thoughts that stick with you.

Whatever the problem is, remember that YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON RESPONSIBLE FOR CHANGING IT. Isn't it great that you have full control of the situation? Then do something about it. Make the right choice for yourself.

#loveyourself #lovetips #weallwantlove #youareworthyoflove #ameliahopeblog #viciouscircle

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